What should you do if you think your partner has an STI but wont tell you?

If you think your partner has an STI and they won't be honest with you about it, the most important thing is to look after yourself.

Get tested. You can go to a sexual health clinic without your partner knowing and get checked for free. It's confidential. You don't need to wait for them to tell you the truth before you take care of your own health.

While you're figuring things out, use condoms. If your partner pushes back on that, that tells you something.

It's also worth trying to have the conversation directly. Not as an accusation, but as a straightforward question: "Have you been tested recently?" or "Is there anything I should know?" If they get angry, avoid the question, or make you feel bad for asking, that's a problem. You have a right to know what you're being exposed to.

If your partner knows they have an STI and is hiding it from you, that's a serious breach of trust. In some cases, knowingly passing on an STI without telling the other person can be a criminal offence.

You can get advice and testing at any sexual health clinic.

If you think your partner has an STI and will not tell you, the most important thing is to look after yourself.

Get tested. You can go to a sexual health clinic on your own. It is free and private. You do not need to wait for them to tell you the truth.

Use condoms while you figure things out.

Try asking them directly. Not as a blame, but as a question like "Have you been tested recently?" If they get angry or avoid answering, that is a problem. You have a right to know.

If someone knows they have an STI and hides it from you, that is a serious betrayal of trust.